So take your gloves and get out

I’m not ready to open some inverted commas and let any
of the other characters talk. The furthest I can get is to sum
up what they said and then comment on that, but without
writing an actual dialogue, the ones in which you start each line with a reply
from the different speakers, those scare me way too much. My writing needs
to be in quick succession, one block, little punctuation, thoughts must flow.

The voice in your head doesn’t have different tones so you have no need of
exclamation points. The only point of view that matters is mine, not to be egocentric,
but in the end this is my space, this is my writing and this is my life. Yeah, sure, I do need to put some other characters in because there wouldn’t be an interesting plot
for the readers (the lack of which clearly shows how bad I am in that), because I think that this is the way any story is written, there needs to be a setting, some characters,
maybe a love story, meaningful friendships, supportive or destructive family; then something bad happens, the situation changes and there is usually a character’s development (I hate characters’ development, why can’t you just write a
nice character right from the beginning?). Anyway, a while
ago, working on some story that wasn’t just a mix of delusional
thoughts, I came up with an interesting character. I really
liked him, I think I had developed an affection towards
him, I liked how he thought, even though we didn’t share
the same opinions (if I wanted to write what I thought I
could have just let my character talk to me like I always do).
I often disagreed with his opinion, but I couldn’t quite shout
at him, I couldn’t walk away, I felt like I couldn’t erase the
sentence in which my character saw him nor I wanted to write
the one in which our paths divided. I was just at the start of the story, he was
walking down this dark street and was heading towards my character. But I
wasn’t scared at all even though it was clear that when they would meet there
would have been an obnoxious need to open some inverted commas. But in that
moment I felt like I was ready to make someone else talk, he could have said
anything but I knew that his voice, that his words, would have
been worth sacrificing the space usually occupied by my character’s
words. I wanted to know how it felt like to write those
dialogues in which you actually talk to someone else that could
say something helpful, that could change your life. I felt safe
and sure that his words wouldn’t hurt me. But since I was writing
a story full of stereotypes, with other characters talking
and all of those usual stuff, I should had seen it coming: the
most common stereotype of all time, the plot twist everyone
expects. It was clear that he wouldn’t have made it, that something
would have stopped him. I’m not going to say that the
story never existed because I will always remember that character
vividly (in the end it was me that made him up), but I’m
not going to be able to make him talk either; still, saying that
the story is unfinished would be a lie, because I’m never going
to open those inverted commas. So that was the end, I guess.
But I swear, I was really looking forward to let that character talk.

Sara De Leo

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